The Oaks at Ojai (California)
At the spa a few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of meeting a group of women, all grandmothers many times over, who were working out and loving the classes. These women looked about as untypical as any grandmother I’ve known, but then again, they said I was pretty exceptional, too.
As we swapped stories and bragged, one point hit home. Women “of a certain age” have so much life experience about staying well and happy, I began to “interview.” I really wanted to know their best health advice. What keeps these gorgeous women going strong and looking great way past the point where some seniors simply give up? Here’s what the grandmas had to say.
Keep learning. The women I talked with read at least one book, fiction and nonfiction, a month. Many read self-help and how-to topics specifically. They go to workshops and two have just enrolled in college, having placed higher education on the back burner when raising their families.
Stay aware of the body. While health problems come with age, as most people over fifty admit, these knock-out grandmas report they stayed on top of “well women” check ups, including mammograms and bone density tests. “Denial only brings disaster,” one woman told me and shared how because she thought her hip problem was, “just old age and couldn’t be improved so I didn’t bother my doctor with it. Then my doctor saw me limp and we had a talk.” A hip replacement, while drastic, now allows her to walk two miles a day and hikes with her grandchildren. They’re just back from Disneyland where Grandma had the time of her life.
Give time away. The women I spoke with where generous with their time in their communities, families and churches. Most said old-fashion retirement was dangerous and I agree. When people stop connecting with others, they withdraw and may become fearful of new situations.
Spend time laughing. The vibrant women swapped jokes and told stories. They seemed to be “humor collectors” and I asked about that. One said, “There has been plenty of tragedy in my life and I made an effort years back to seek ways to laugh. It’s like aerobic exercise—keeps my mind fit.”
Be natural. If there was one thing the women stressed was to be themselves. They were comfortable in their bodies and really sought out ways to make others feel wanted, appreciated and special. Forgive and love again. At any age, we can be hurt when we love. What I learned during the “interview” session was that the women have learned to accept flaws in others and reached out even after sad situations. “Life is too short is an understatement,” said one, “Grudges are too heavy.”
Play. The grandmothers all told me they were unafraid to fail so they often tried activities that “old” people would never try. One in the group just learned to tango. Another was taking flying lessons. They all agreed while they had more wrinkles than twenty years ago, they also now realized how important it was to take time to relax, enjoy hobbies, travel and make new friends.
Eat to live. While not ballerina thin, all of the women were in a healthy range for their body sizes. They eat to live and not live to eat. Since most of the women live alone, they’ve found gathering for potluck dinners, trying recipes designed for singles, and cooking ethnic and unusual foods takes away the doldrums of solitary living.
Exercise as if life depends on it. I so agree with this piece of advice from the grandmothers. While no one in this spirited group was about to run the Boston Marathon (okay, they did want to walk it), they all participated in some form of exercise. The favorite routine was brisk walking, followed by dancing, swimming, singles tennis and cycling.
Being a grandmother isn’t what it once was, it’s better because we’re learning to stay fit for life.
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