Canyon Ranch (Massachusetts)

Do you go into withdrawal if you haven't checked your e-mail for three hours? Are you a slave to your BlackBerry, submissive to your cell phone? In love with your laptop? If there was a "yes" in there, you're a paid-up member of our plugged-in society. But whether technology is your toy or work tool, the price of being permanently available may be higher than you realize.

Cell phones and the Internet are part of our culture. We're rarely out of touch. You can take that weekend hike because you're not tied to a land line. That vital phone call will wing straight to your backpack or pocket, like a homing pigeon with GPS. You can even check e-mail on your BlackBerry while you rest on the trail. If you're rock-climbing and break a leg, your cell phone can be a life-saver.

Technology can definitely work to your advantage. But accessibility is a two-sided coin. The expectation that we'll stay connected is a powerful dynamic that can affect how you relate to friends and family and prevent you from being fully present to one other.

Addicted to e-mail
Do you constantly check your email, even if you're not expecting anything remotely important? Computer addiction is being identified as a clinical syndrome. It's a conditioning process: When you get a desired e-mail, the reward center in your brain is flooded with stimulating, gratifying neurotransmitters and you get a mild high.

E-mail, computers and phones can split our attention to the splintering point. We're paying continuous partial attention, and it can prove costly. Brain imaging proves that multitasking results in poorer performance - for example, if you use a cell phone while driving, the regions of your brain responsible for steering or braking show less activity than if you gave the road your full attention.

Technology can also disrupt your home life. When you walk in your front door, the work world can follow - if you let it. By replying to work calls and e-mails, you extend your work week and reduce your contact with family. Family members may feel disrespected and conclude that your work is more important than the health and well-being of a family or a relationship

Unplug before you unpack
We all need real, undistracted time away from work and everyday pressures. If you're plugged in on vacation, you may lose the opportunity to replenish your inner self. For travelers who need help unplugging, some hotels even offer to lock up your cell phone, BlackBerry and other high-tech interruptions.

An important feature of vacation is the opportunity to experience deep, replenishing rest - but if work intrudes in the shape of emails and cell phone calls, your mind won't be refreshed. The beauty and energy of nature can be healing and restorative. Walking on the beach in a relaxed state of mind allows you to tap into a physiological state that's not available when sitting at your computer.

Set boundaries
Letting work into your personal life can cause casualties. If electronic beeps always take priority, your loved ones may be frustrated over constantly disrupted conversations and incomplete attention. Try setting guidelines for using technology more selectively - and gain some peace of mind in the process.

Ways to unplug:
• No computers or TV in the bedroom.
• Limit checking e-mail to certain times of day.
• Don't answer the phone during meals.
• In social situations, just turn off your cell phone. Don't allow yourself to be available.
• Create individualized ring tones. Only pick up if the caller is on your "available-to" list.
• When going on vacation, use the "out-of-office" feature on your email. Include a note referring callers to someone else who can answer questions.
• For short absences, set boundaries up front. Leave a voice-mail message detailing your work hours. It sends the message: "Call me between these times or call back tomorrow."
• In the office, deliver some messages in person instead of emailing 15 feet. It shows the person is important to you and that you're taking time out of your day to connect with them. Also, you get to get up and move around!

Unplug your kids
Include your children in your family electronic guidelines. Elementary-school and younger children have been shown to benefit from having limited access to computers, cell phones and television. The act of unplugging can help them become more present to what's around them, and to connect with family, nature and their own creativity.

High school grads need computer literacy skills, but, say experts, young children need to be actively engaged with nature, art, creative play, music and movement. When exposed to TV and computers too early, their brains and bodies may become passive, and produce passive learners or followers rather than leaders.

Whatever your age, unplugging can bring you closer to the people and the beauty around you and regenerate your mind and spirit. Step back, set some simple boundaries and reclaim the connections that really matter.

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